One in five boys know someone their age who is in a relationship with an AI chatbot, according to a new survey.

Male Allies UK caught up with over 1,000 boys aged 12-16 years old to dive into their behaviour and attitudes when it comes to engaging with AI chatbots.

The vast majority, eight in 10 boys (85%) have had a conversation with a chatbot, with 43% of boys saying they are talking to bots so they can ask questions that they have without feeling embarrassed.

Over a quarter (26%) said they like the attention and connection over real-life connections.

Robot romance is also on the rise, with over half of boys (58%) saying that AI relationships are easier because you can control the conversation.

Over one third (36%) of boys admitted they prefer speaking to AI chatbots over family and friends.

Lee Chambers, founder of Male Allies UK, said: “As parents we didn’t grow up with chatbots, and so we’re left in the dark on whether they are harmless or dangerous.

“What we do know is that spending time online can feel sociable but can actually be incredibly isolating. The main problem with developing a relationship with an AI chatbot is that it means that you are spending that time speaking to technology instead of building real-life connections.”

Chambers noted that chatbots are, by default, submissive, and reassure and reaffirm people’s thoughts because “they want you to like them”.

“On top of this you can create your perfect ‘person’, moulding not only how they look but how they respond to you, how they treat you, and you can start and stop the relationship on a whim. This isn’t real life – and these instant gratification behaviours seeping into real life will have consequences.”

AI bots aren’t just being used as companions, either. Chambers noted they are enabling behaviour in boys that can cause irreparable damage with the rise of nudification apps.

Almost one in 10 (9% of) boys aged 12-16 years old have used AI to create sexual images of their friends, with 5% admitting to using AI to create sexual images of family members, according to Male Allies research.

Just under half (47%) of boys in this age bracket know of sexual AI images/videos being created whilst at school.

New data from the Boys In Schools report from Male Allies explored reasons as to why boys might be spending more time online – and turning to AI chatbots for company.

Most (81% of) boys say they don’t think there are enough physical spaces for them.

Chambers suggested boys need “real-life connection and conversation” and “to know that they are supported and that they can speak up about what they are doing online without being judged”.

“We can’t just remove every new trend online, instead we need to bridge the gap between boys who are growing up with social media and AI and parents who are worried about the unknown,” he said.

Kids chat about a lot of pretty odd stuff (remember Ballerina Cappuccina?) – however if you’ve heard them mention ‘gooning’ in conversation with their mates, or during gaming, it’s certainly worth pulling them up on it.

While you might consider ‘gooning’ as messing around or even goofing about (that’s what first came to my mind), per Mashable, it actually means “masturbating for a prolonged period of time, usually hours, without ever climaxing”.

In online spaces, it can also refer to zoning out as a result of intense sexual arousal, which Gabb (a company providing child-safe phones and tech) notes is “most often in the context of pornography”.

The issue is, if tweens and teens are using this terminology, chances are they are coming across pornography or inappropriate content online.

It’s not uncommon – over one-quarter (27%) of kids have come across pornography by age 11, according to a survey by the Children’s Commissioner.

While children shouldn’t be easily coming across porn due to stricter regulation as part of the Online Safety Act, they may still find ways to access it.

If your tween or teen is talking about gooning, even if it’s just joking with friends, it’s definitely worth asking them about it.

If they are getting involved in this activity, Fiona Yassin, a family psychotherapist, told HuffPost UK: “There’s a real neurodevelopmental risk here. During adolescence, the brain is still under construction – very much a work in progress – and when it’s repeatedly flooded with high-intensity sexual content, it drives spikes in dopamine that can create a pathway towards compulsive cycles.

“Over time, young people may need more and more intensity to achieve the same effect, which mirrors the mechanisms we see in other forms of addiction. That’s particularly concerning in a developing brain.”

Yassin, who is the founder and clinical director of The Wave Clinic, also warned that it can impact social development (zoning out in front of a screen might increase isolation, anxiety and low mood) and attachment, particularly as far as sexual relationships are concerned.

“This can disrupt the development of healthy attachment, increasing impulsivity, risk-taking, and a disregard for personal and relational safety,” she explained.

Teens who are exposed to this kind of content can also begin to develop unrealistic expectations of themselves and others, particularly as far as sex and relationships are concerned.

“It can encourage objectification, a sense of disposability in relationships, and a reduced capacity for genuine intimacy – building, sustaining, and nurturing connection,” said Yassin.

Ultimately, she warned, “it can shift how young people see others, which can lead to the oversexualisation of what would otherwise be non-sexual interactions”.

“That has wide-reaching implications for how they relate, connect, and develop into adulthood.”

Some children might use the word without fully understanding where it comes from and the potential impact on others. So, the key here is to be curious about where they’ve heard the term and what they think it means – which can help steer your conversations going forward.

“Rather than reacting with frustration or alarm, the most effective starting point for parents is to stay calm and curious,” said Yassin.

“Parents may ask: ‘What does this word mean to you?’ or ‘What do you think someone else might hear or feel when that word is used?’. Like many aspects of child and adolescent mental health, this situation offers a valuable teaching and learning opportunity.”

If they do know the full meaning, the therapist urges parents to seize the opportunity for age-appropriate honesty. “Teens, in particular, are more likely to engage when they feel respected, rather than lectured,” she added.

“Parents can gently widen the conversation to the bigger picture, which might include the consequences of the word, how pornography can shape expectations, impact mental health, and, in some cases, lead to more compulsive patterns of behaviour.”

Action for Children has a few helpful pointers for talking to kids about porn, but ultimately it advises parents to reassure kids it’s OK to feel curious about sex, while also explaining that “porn is unrealistic” and it “can be harmful for them to watch it”.

If there’s one thing we know about Gen Alpha, it’s that they low-key delight in coining a new word (or five) and the odd nonsensical phrase.

Take six-seven for example. It became a global phenomenon in 2025 thanks to social media, but it didn’t ever really mean anything. Or, at least, nobody could agree on a meaning.

Some said it meant “so-so” (as kids used it with an up-and-down hand motion), others thought it meant a tall person, or a basketball term.

In the end it just became a response that kids made at every opportunity – especially if someone (a teacher, parent, classmate) happened to mention those two numbers in a different context.

A teacher could say “turn to page 67 in your books”, for example, and the classroom would erupt into “six-sevennnnnn”.

This disruption ultimately led to the phrase being banned in some classrooms.

Thankfully the bizarre phrase seems to have fizzled out, but teachers and parents are noticing that “lowkenuinely” has entered the chat instead.

Lowkenuinely is a combination of ‘lowkey’ and ‘genuinely’, which describes expressing something sincere in a casual, laid-back way, according to experts at language platform Preply.

Essentially, it is a TikTok-era way of saying something is real or heartfelt. So, an example might be: “I lowkenuinely love this song” or “I’m lowkenuinely not going to make it through this exam”.

Kids of the internet clearly love a portmanteau (that is, blending two words together to create a new one).

Choppelganger is another recent creation hot off their keyboards, combining ‘chopped’, typically used by teens to describe someone as ugly; and ‘doppelganger’, which is a person who resembles someone else.

A choppelganger, then, is an uglier version of a doppelganger. One parent noted their kids had referred to them as “Uncle Fester’s Choppelganger”. Harsh.

There’s also been chat, clock it and glazing, as well as aura farming and crash out. Honestly, they’ve been busy.

Most children of secondary school age (we’re talking 12- to 15-year-olds) have a smartphone – and some of them will be allowed to have one on the condition they’re happy to give their device up every now and then for their parents to check.

But what happens if, during one of these checks, you spot something that makes your heart sink? And what about if your teen hasn’t given you permission to check their phone, but you’ve seen a notification flash up that’s left you worried?

It’s a minefield – and there’s no set rule for tackling this, as everyone’s situation will be different. That said, experts have shared their thoughts on how to approach this tricky moment, without causing a huge rift.

Counselling Directory member Bella Hird told HuffPost UK parents who have an agreement in place with their child where they can do spot checks “are in a very good starting place”.

“Think of your child’s phone a little as you would think of the world. They need your support to navigate it. There will be places and situations that, until they reach a certain age, you would not let them wander off into unsupervised,” she said.

If there’s a message on their phone that worries you, the therapist advises having a chat with your child about it: “Approach the conversation with your child with honesty and curiosity. So for example, explain ‘this kind of message really worries me and I want to know we are keeping you safe, can you explain to me a little about the context?’.”

She then urges parents to allow their child the space to explain. Try not to react in fear or anger as this will simply shut the conversation down. Punishments will simply drive a wedge further, too.

Education and child psychologist Dr Sasha Hall said the key here is offering a calm and proportionate response, rather than punishment.

If messages involve adult or sexualised content, the psychologist said key considerations include: whether the material is age-appropriate; whether there is any risk, pressure or coercion; and whether the young person understands boundaries and consent.

“Adolescence is a stage where children need increasing autonomy and privacy compared to earlier childhood, but this should be matched with developmentally appropriate safeguards,” she added.

“The aim is not to remove independence, but to support safe decision-making while those skills are still forming.”

Bird added that it’s important to help your child understand that it is OK to make mistakes and that being open with you will ultimately end with them feeling supported with potentially difficult or dangerous scenarios.

“Explain to your child what it is about the message or what you have seen that has concerned you and ask them if they understand your worries,” she said.

“They will probably tell you there is nothing to be concerned about, in which case ask them to explain more.”

There might be times when you think your child is in danger – for example, they are being groomed – in which case, you will need to take action. Bird said “it is really important to try to take your child on that journey with you”.

She advised: “Explain to them why you are doing what you are doing it and give them as much agency as possible – so, for example, in the case that you need to involve the police, you should explain that you need to do that and why, and let them know what is likely to happen. But give them choices like ‘would you like me to explain to them or would you like to?’ and ‘who would you like with you?’

“Avoid making them feel punished or ashamed because these experiences are a real barrier to connection and collaboration. They are still learning about the world and that’s OK.”

If you don’t have your teenager’s consent to look at their phone – and you’ve done so and seen something that is cause for concern – Bird suggests asking yourself two questions.

Firstly, what is the worst thing that will happen if I address this? And secondly, what is the worst thing that will happen if I don’t address this?

“I am sure the answer to the first question involves making a teen angry and having an impact on levels of trust, but the answer to the second question is likely to make your decision to act or not pretty simple,” she added.

“When talking to your teen, take responsibility. Apologise for not being open with them about looking at their phone, but explain your reasons for doing so.”

Dr Hall noted that in this instance, repair becomes especially important.

“Acknowledging the breach of trust, explaining the concern clearly, and working together to renegotiate boundaries helps model accountability and respect,” she said.

“Repairing trust is often more impactful than the original rule-setting, as it teaches young people how relationships recover after mistakes.”

Once you have resolved the matter of concern, talk to your teen about how you will balance privacy and safety moving forward.

Dr Hall concluded: “Ultimately, phone safety is not about constant surveillance. It is about gradually teaching young people how to manage privacy, boundaries and risk online, while maintaining an open, supportive line of communication so they know they can ask for help when they need it.”