I got to visit my memory care friends at the assisted living facility this week. And this visit started off right in the lobby instead of in the big room like it usually does. One of our regulars, the nonverbal woman, was sitting right there on a sofa. So I visited with her first.

When my human and I first encountered this woman, she was barely responsive and would pet me by heavily placing her hands on me instead of really petting me. She was barely present. Over the years, however, she’s really opened up when I come see her. She still doesn’t communicate verbally…but considering this is an assisted living for dementia and Alzheimer’s patients, those that do talk often don’t make a lot of sense anyway. Still, we’ve learned a lot about who this woman is.

No, we don’t know anything about her past or how she wound up at the facility. We barely know her first name. That’s not the important part anyway. We do know she’s artistic because occasionally in her wanderings, she is carrying a drawing she has made. Yes, the drawings are crude and simple, but they still show an intriguing piece of her. And we know she loves me because she is so happy when I show up. I can’t explain how we figured that out early on, because it was so hard to see her smile. But it was there.

Gradually, she has become more present when I see her, and she pets me a lot more deliberately and less heavily. This time, in fact, she petted me gently, her thick, double jointed fingers softly touching my fur. And her face lit up in a big smile when she spent time with me on this visit. She was glowing, and it was so special to see.

My human and I focus a lot on this woman when we visit for a reason. With a lot of the residents, even when they are fading, it’s easy to see their humanity — who they once were, and get a feeling of their personality. With someone like the nonverbal woman, you don’t get that. You have no idea who she ever was, or if she was once out in society at all. It’s hard to picture her as a mother, daughter or sister. And people like her are so easy to overlook.

Early on, my human made a decision to never overlook her. She sensed right away that I was important to her. And now we always look forward to seeing her at this residence.

Yes, the rest of the visit was fun, and the other residents were pretty lively. The woman who likes my high fives kept ticking the face of one of my other regulars with my tail! The fading man who loves me brightened up the moment he saw me and happily posed for photos with me for the staff. I met a few new wheelchair bound people who were so happy to see a kitty. But the first ten minutes of my visit with our friend made the visit — the whole day in fact — a bit brighter than usual.