‘Prague’s ugly sister’ is a walkable gem with £2 pints and a blue church
Dull. Boring. Disappointing.
These are not the adjectives you want to describe your next city break, but after booking flights to Bratislava, this is what the internet offered up to me.
‘The most boring capital city I’ve ever been to,’ is a much-upvoted post on Reddit, in reference to the Slovak capital.
Back in the 90s, travel guru Simon Calder wrote of its ‘dismal reputation’ and its rather cruel nickname: ‘Prague’s ugly sister’. Ouch.
At the airport, a group on a hen do asked where my bestie and I were headed.
Our answer was met with a shrug and a ‘never heard of it’ — a marginal improvement over being informed that the place is rubbish, yet again.
But I’m here to tell you that while it might be one of Europe’s smallest capital cities, Bratislava is not to be underestimated.
Here’s how to spend a thoroughly enjoyable weekend in Europe’s ‘Little Big City’ that deserves to shake off its bad reputation.
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Day 1
Straddling the Danube and bordering the Austrian and Hungarian frontiers, Bratislava’s magic lies in its Old Town, a largely pedestrianised area with charming squares, attractive buildings and thriving cafe culture.
This is the kind of city you go to to actually relax. You don’t need to do much in the way of planning, you can amble around, with a partner or your pals, giving them — and the city — your full attention.
And as you wander, the first thing you’ll need to do is grab breakfast. Bratislava claims to have more coffee shops per square kilometre than any city in Europe — there’s literally one on every corner, so you’re spoilt for choice.
I stopped by Bloom Bakery for a coffee and Bratislavské rožky — Bratislava roll, a horseshoe of pastry with poppy seeds or a rich, walnut filling. Highly recommend. They bake all their stuff on site.
Other decent spots are Kauka, with its aesthetic pink interiors, and Blue Mondays, which has an outdoor terrace.
On the fringes of the Old Town, there’s also the glass-fronted Propeller, where you can sip a flat white overlooking the Danube.
Sightseeing is a pretty light lift in Bratislava, but I liked that it was low stakes without the pressure of a strict itinerary. You can mooch around, popping into one of the many concept stores and drinking more coffee in between ticking things off the tourist trail.
Check out Michael’s Gate, the last remaining medieval city gate in Bratislava, admire St Martin’s Cathedral, a beautiful church inside and out, and take a picture with Cumil, Bratislava’s notorious sewer worker statue that pops up out of a manhole cover.
A (steep) walk up to the castle is rewarded with views over the city. From the top, you can see UFO, a road bridge complete with a flying saucer-shaped observation deck.
For lunch, swing by colourful sister restaurants Brixton House and Urban House. They serve small plates and familiar international favourites (gyoza, cacio e pepe, steak) in a buzzy atmosphere.
Then, to finish, walk to the highly Instagrammable Blue Church on the edge of the Old Town.
Often compared to an iced cake or a marshmallow thanks to its powder blue facade, the small Art Nouveau church, with its curved edges and whimsical vibe, is not to be missed.
Once you’ve had your fill of sights, I beg you to book a spot on a wine tasting at the Slovak National Collection of Wine.
The experience is listed on a couple of travel blogs, but frankly, I don’t know why this isn’t plastered on billboards as soon as you land in the airport.
For £42 (booked via Get Your Guide), you’re invited to try 80 wines in 100 minutes. Challenge accepted.
Upon entering a small wine cellar in the Old Town, I was given an empty glass, a bread basket and two magic words: ‘free pour’.
While Peter, the friendly sommelier, is happy to chat about top notes and legs, he’ll also leave you to roam the three rooms (sparkling, red and white) freely, drinking as much (or as little) as you like.
If you’re a real wine connoisseur, there are probably more informative experiences, but I can guarantee they won’t be as fun.
The last 100-minute tasting of the day is at 4pm, just in time to stumble out in search of dinner.
The Slovak Pub is the largest bar in the city and a favourite among students and tourists — staff wear t-shirts emblazoned with the words ‘Bar-Slava’. It’s a rustic vibe with wooden beams and a maze of different rooms.
I won’t pretend to be an expert in central European cuisine but I enjoyed tucking into the Slovak dishes, particularly the cheesy garlic soup, served in a bowl made out of bread, and the potato dumplings.
Be sure to try the national dish, Bryndzové Halušky, smaller potato dumplings (kind of like gnocchi) mixed with cheese and topped with crispy bacon.
If you want to keep the drinks flowing, the Old Town has bars and pubs aplenty. Bratislava is stag-do central, but the vibe was friendly and fun rather than obnoxious.
There are, of course, Irish pubs, the mainstay of stag-do destinations the world over (and the cost of a pint here averages at around just £2.20). End the night at the underground Goblins Pub or the Dubliner, where I stayed until close, dancing (badly) to the live band. If someone offers you a shot of Bošácka Slivovica, just say no.
If you’re looking for something a little more sophisticated, head to Michalska Cocktail Room, a speakeasy accessible via a wardrobe, or the late-night Bukoswki Bar, open until 3am on Friday and Saturday.
Where to stay in Bratislava
- The Grand Hotel River Park is a five-star hotel, complete with a spa and swimming pool, and just 15 minutes from the airport. Away from the stag groups of the Old Town, it’s a more peaceful spot to rest your head. Room rates start from £162.
- For a cheaper alternative, Hotel Saffron, around a 10 minute walk from the centre of the Old Town, is a four-star hotel with a restaurant and gym. For a one-night stay for a weekend in May, a standard double room starts from just £87.
Day 2
Okay, so technically I didn’t spend my Sunday in Bratislava.
Instead, I booked a spot on a day trip with TrailTails’ From Bratislava (£110 on TripAdvisor.)
More than a little bleary-eyed after the wine, the 6.30am call time was a lot.
Mercifully, our driver, Lucky, greeted us with snacks and water right outside the hotel, then swiftly stopped for coffee. Five stars.
The day trip is an undertaking. By the afternoon, you’ll end up more than 200 miles away from the city, not far from the Polish border in the High Tatras mountains, which are known as Europe’s ‘mini Alps’.
Before that though, your first stop is the village of Čičmany.
Officially a protected monument, people come here to visit the black timber houses, each painted with intricate patterns.
Lucky tells us that around 200 years ago, a local woman ‘got bored’ and decided to get crafty with a paint brush. Others followed suit, and now each house is a work of folk art.
There’s something slightly weird about the village, though. It’s incredibly quiet (even the dogs weren’t barking) but the houses are worth a visit. There’s a shop and cafe, too.
The next stop is the fairytale Bojnice Castle, which dates back to 1113 and is one of the oldest in Slovakia.
Set on a lake in a landscaped park, it’s a beautiful place to wander around, and there’s another cute cafe to get yourself some more delicious Bratislava rolls.
If you have time to go inside, you can get a guided tour of the cave hidden beneath the castle.
Stop three is – you guessed it – another castle, Orava Castle, famous for being the filming location for 1922 horror, Nosferatu.
It’s a little creepy, and there are a lot of stairs, but the views are worth it.
The best bit about this stop though has to be the lunch at Thurzov Mlyn, a few steps from the castle. More garlic soup and dumplings were ordered, along with schnitzel, fried cheese and more red wine.
Then finally, it’s off to the mountains, and the ski resort of Štrbské Pleso. The scenery is breathtaking: snow-capped peaks, a frozen lake, and icicles hanging off the trees.
While Lucky encouraged our group to take a walk around the lake, I opted for a less treacherous option: a hot drink under a blanket at SIH Restaurant, overlooking the water.
It’s a stunning sight, and hard to believe you’re just hours from the sunny little streets of Bratislava.
The journey back from the High Tatras takes about three hours.
It’s a long old day, and if you’d rather spend it bopping around the Old Town, drinking more wine and walking along the banks of the Danube, then that works, too.
But to glimpse a side of Slovakia that so few see, this was a good way to do it.
How to get to Bratislava
Ryanair flies direct from London Stansted to Bratislava, with one-way flights currently available for as little as £14.99.
Bratislava Airport is just 9km from the city centre, making transfers easy. Avoid local taxis (I was quoted €35) and catch the bus, which stops outside of the airport and costs just €1.60. Tickets can be purchased via the app.
Ubers and Bolts are cheap to, with the journey costing around €12.
Some travellers also choose to fly in and out of Vienna, Austria, which is less than an hour away.
Fun fact: Bratislava and Vienna are the two closest capital cities in Europe, at just 31 miles apart.
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